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Author Pam Bailey’s Ancestry Search Led to First Time Reunion with Close Family in South Florida

THE WESTSIDE GAZETTE — America’s dark tragic past with African Americans through slavery, reconstruction and Jim Crow laws led to many families being forcibly torn apart with very little chances of reconciliation. That forced separation by a racist system set on destroying any form of family for Black Americans has caused many people to wonder where their families actually come from.

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Bailey found several members of the Miami Green family were DNA matches to her. Dr. Green was unaware of any SC ancestral connection. Bailey’s family, who shares biological connection to the Florida Greens and Lawrences, were enslaved in Clarendon County, South

By Janey Tate

MIAMI, FL — America’s dark tragic past with African Americans through slavery, reconstruction and Jim Crow laws led to many families being forcibly torn apart with very little chances of reconciliation. That forced separation by a racist system set on destroying any form of family for Black Americans has caused many people to wonder where their families actually come from.

This question is what caused Pamela J. Bailey, an author and adjunct professor from Dallas, to begin the complicated search to learn where her ancestors are from and where their off springs live today.

“My family was forced to migrate during the Antebellum period of the slave trade. We put a lot of focus, which is important, on the transatlantic slave trade. However, there were so many people who were American born between 1810 and 1860 that were relocated all over this country and those bonds were broken,” Bailey said.

She began researching her family on both sides ten years ago, but in 2017 started to make strong headway. She took a DNA test by Ancestry.com and used GEDmatch and Social Media to connect her family tree. After countless hours of research, Bailey was led to three of her closely related cousins here in South Florida. That led to a family reunion on August 3, 2019 in South Miami.

Her first major connection was to her cousin Phylis Lawson, who lives in Broward County. It began from Bailey randomly liking a Facebook page for a  book she thought was interesting. She later found out that the woman whose book she admired from afar was in fact her long lost cousin.

Lawson is the author of a book titled “Quilt of Souls.” Bailey was intrigued that Lawson had built this story around former enslaved people who were quilting. Lawson said as a kid growing up in Alabama  she would sit under the porch when it was scorching hot and listen to older people tell stories about slavery and Jim Crow.

“I thought that was fascinating so I liked her book on Facebook and we became friends. It wasn’t until two or more years later that I was in that GEDmatch DNA database, and I was sorta looking through it to see if anything looks familiar. And people would leave their email addresses and one of the email addresses was quiltofsouls@gmail.com,” Bailey said.

She knew that name matched the book she was a fan of and sparked her curiosity to ask Lawson about their possible family connection, so she messaged her on Facebook.

“I said look, I know this sounds really wild but I think we’re family. I think that your family might be connected to my family from South Carolina. And so her initial response was I don’t’ have any family from South Carolina. My family is from Alabama and have been there for generations,” said Bailey of the Facebook conversation.

She later would get multiple excited messages from Lawson in the middle of the night. Lawson told Bailey that she had done some of her own research after they spoke and discovered they were in fact related through her mother from a relative named Josh Horn. He was a former slave that was interviewed as a part of the Federal Writers Project. Bailey knew Horn was her relative and that this was in fact a true match.

The second person Bailey connected with was her cousin Dr. Carey Green, a heart specialist in Miami.

“When I reached out to Carey, there were several people in his family, including his brother and a nephew who I was connected to biologically,” said Bailey. “Carey had no idea that there were any connections to South Carolina [in his family].”

Bailey explained their connection is through her family in Clarendon County. Her Green family branch comes from here, which is her connection to Dr. Green. They discovered that they both have relatives with the name Sipio from South Carolina. Their ancestors were forcibly split apart by their slave owner Pierce Mease Butler, who held the largest sale of slaves of more than 600 people at a race track in Savannah, Georgia in 1850. That sale was called “the Weeping Time” by reporters of the time who covered the event. Part of their family was sold and sent to the El Destino Plantation in the Florida panhandle, which is where Green said his family is from.

The third connection Bailey made was to Jean Jackson and her daughter Cherria Brown. They discovered they were related through their Dewitt family members, who were owned by German slave owners of the same name who lived in Horry County, which is home to Myrtle Beach.

“The most striking thing was they look so much like parts of family in South Carolina that it just kinda took me aback. I thought they are definitely my family,” said Bailey.

Jackson and Brown had been doing their own research on their family tree, and there was a missing part of the family they couldn’t find. When they connected with Bailey they learned that missing family branch was through her grandmother, Isla Henrietta Dewitt.

All of Bailey’s family members met at Dr. Green’s medical office in South Miami on a Saturday morning this Summer. Bailey said before the meeting she was very anxious.

“I remember walking through the door and I felt myself get emotional. I walked in and it was just a lot. I was excited and on the verge of tears. They were excited too,” Bailey said. “There were lots of hugs.”

“Every single person just felt like family. They were happy to meet me. They were happy to have this history restored. They want to be known to the parts of the family that has been scattered. And so now we’re talking about ways that we can get together so we can bring these various parts of the family together because it would be my ancestors’ wildest dreams. It’s not something they could have ever imagined,” Bailey said.

Although all the families are related to Bailey on her mother or father’s side of the family, they’re not necessarily related to each other. Bailey explained that the DNA testing matches for people who are related at least 5th cousin or closer to you. Even though they are not all directly related, Bailey said they still connected and talked for hours over lunch about their lives and what each branch of the family was up to.

Pamela J. Bailey, originally from Mullins, South Carolina, is married and has two children. She moved to Dallas ten years ago and wrote a book titled “Sanctuary: Creating a Blessed Place to Live and Love.” She has taught at a private college in Dallas for the past 4 years as an adjunct professor and has her own production company called Blue Rose Media Company, where she produces content on Black Ancestry in the United States.

Bailey said her Big Family Search Project will guide her new creative projects and the type of content she shares.

“I realized this is the responsibility that I’ve been given,” said Bailey. “I can’t help but to believe that God has a way and maybe those ancestors who have gone on are doing everything they can do to help me make these connections.”

Bailey found several members of the Miami Green family were DNA matches to her. Dr. Green was unaware of any SC ancestral connection. Bailey’s family, who shares biological connection to the Florida Greens and Lawrences, were enslaved in Clarendon County, South.

Bailey and Jean Jackson (teal shirt) are both the great granddaughters of Daniel DeWitt who was enslaved in Horry County, South Carolina. Jean and her husband have raised a family of multigenerational entrepreneurs in Florida.

This article originally appeared in The Westside Gazette.

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Smooth Ride! Car Suspension & Comfort Tested #shorts

Smooth suspension meets surprisingly spacious legroom. Experience true comfort on any road!

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Car suspension test demonstrating a smooth ride, comfort features, and handling on various terrains.

Experience the difference smooth suspension makes on rough streets. Check out the surprisingly good second-row legroom – test it yourself for true comfort.

🔗 Watch the full video: https://youtu.be/l9Z571za5Gc

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61 years since Selma, Houston leaders say the bridge remains to be crossed

61 years after Selma, Houston leaders say the fight for equality continues. The issues that sparked the marches still impact Black Americans today.

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Houston leaders discuss the ongoing struggle for civil rights 61 years after Selma, emphasizing the need for continued action.

It has been 61 years since the Selma marches. But political leaders in Houston say that the issues protesters were marching for still plague the lives of Black Americans.

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Here is what you need to know about finding unique white elephant gift ideas that everyone wants to steal

The best white elephant gift ideas are funny enough to get a reaction but useful enough that people actually want to steal them. Look for gifts with a surprise factor, broad appeal, an inside joke, and just enough personality to spark some friendly competition. The wrapping paper comes off, the room goes quiet for half […]

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The best white elephant gift ideas are funny enough to get a reaction but useful enough that people actually want to steal them. Look for gifts with a surprise factor, broad appeal, an inside joke, and just enough personality to spark some friendly competition.

The wrapping paper comes off, the room goes quiet for half a second, and suddenly everyone wants the same gift. That is the sweet spot. A great white elephant pick should make people laugh, lean in, and start plotting their next steal before the turn is even over.

Should a White Elephant Gift Be Funny or Useful?

A white elephant gift can be funny or useful, but the strongest choices usually give people a reason to laugh and a reason to keep the item. A practical gift with an odd design, unexpected feature, or playful theme can get a reaction without becoming something the recipient immediately wants to give away.

The right balance depends on the group. Close friends and family members may enjoy a ridiculous gag gift because they already understand one another’s sense of humor.

A workplace exchange, neighborhood party, or mixed-age gathering usually calls for something with broader appeal. In those settings, humor works better when it is built into an item people could still use afterward.

It also helps to think about how quickly the gift will make sense once it is opened. A strangely shaped kitchen tool, oversized mug, quirky desk accessory, or unexpectedly fancy everyday item can create an immediate reaction. Guests understand the joke right away, while the item still has enough practical value to attract a steal.

Pure gag gifts can be harder to pull off. Something that exists only for the punchline may get a big laugh during the reveal and then sit untouched for the rest of the game. If the goal is to bring one of the gifts everyone keeps fighting over, usefulness gives the joke staying power.

Memorable Present Ideas: Creating Inside Joke Gifts

Inside joke gifts can make a white elephant exchange feel much more personal, especially when most of the group shares the same stories. The trick is choosing a reference that people will recognize quickly instead of building the entire joke around something only two guests understand.

You can turn a memorable vacation mishap, office catchphrase, family story, or long-running group joke into the theme of the gift. A personalized comic book can work especially well when it turns familiar people or a ridiculous shared moment into part of the story. 

Think carefully about who the joke involves before ordering anything permanent. The gift should make the person feel included in the fun, not singled out for the wrong reason.

Can You Bring Something You Already Own?

Holiday gift exchanges can be a good place to re-gift something you never used, especially if it is unopened and clean.

The following can all work if they still look presentable:

  • A duplicate kitchen gadget
  • An untouched game
  • A decorative item
  • A sealed gift set 
  • An unopened candle
  • A new travel accessory

The goal is to give the item a second chance, not use the exchange as an excuse to clear out damaged or unwanted clutter.

Take a close look at the packaging before wrapping it. Faded boxes, missing pieces, visible wear, or anything that looks obviously used can make the gift feel careless. 

Wrapping Budget-Friendly Gifts

Wrapping can make gifts more entertaining before anyone even knows what’s inside.

Misdirection works especially well for fun party games. Put a small gift inside a much larger box. Use packaging from an unrelated household item.

Add harmless weight so guests cannot guess what they are holding. The reveal becomes part of the joke without changing the gift itself.

You can also lean into the theme of the exchange. Bright paper, oversized bows, reusable bags, or deliberately over-the-top wrapping can make an ordinary item feel more memorable. If the gift itself is already funny, simple wrapping may work better so the surprise stays hidden until the last second.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is Picking Last an Advantage in White Elephant?

Picking last can be an advantage because you get to see almost every gift before making your move. Instead of choosing blindly from the remaining wrapped presents, you can steal something that has already caught your attention if the rules still allow it.

That advantage depends on the house rules. Some games limit how many times a gift can be stolen.

Others lock an item once it reaches a certain number of steals. If the most popular gifts are already unavailable, the final player may have fewer strong options than expected.

The first player can also get another turn at the end in some versions of the game. That rule can balance things out, since the person who started with the least information may get one final chance to steal.

How Do You Plan White Elephant for a Large Group?

For a large white elephant exchange, set a firm spending limit and establish the stealing rules in advance.

Create a clear turn order before the game begins. Drawing numbers as guests arrive can save time once everyone is ready to start.

Keep the number of steals per gift limited so the game does not drag on. It also helps to have one person track which creative holiday presents have been stolen and when they are locked, especially if dozens of people are participating.

Can You Play White Elephant Virtually?

A virtual white elephant exchange can work over a video call, with one person keeping track of the turn order and each steal. Guests can either mail physical gifts ahead of time or use digital gifts that can be delivered once the game ends.

Set the spending limit and stealing rules before everyone joins. It also helps to decide how gifts will be revealed and who is responsible for sending each one afterward so the exchange does not become confusing.

Choose a Perfect White Elephant Gift in a Snap

Look for a white elephant gift that fits some of these criteria, and everyone will be trying to grab it at your next celebration.

Do you need more gift-giving tips and tricks? Make sure you read some of our other posts.

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