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Miscarriage: An Unspoken Taboo

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Narissa L. Harris

The holidays bring up a myriad of feelings. Amongst them are joy, anxiety, excitement, and loss. Many people reminisce and others dream about their wishes for self and others. During this time, many feel the loss or experience of missing a recently departed relative, parent or spouse. Some are overwhelmed with finding oneself and family now homeless for the first time. The one unspeakable source of sadness that is seldom openly talked about is miscarriage.

While the birth of a new child is often thought of as a returning of a relative or Ancestral spirit, miscarriage is surrounded by taboo and deep unstated meanings. Traditionally our lifestyles supported and honored our ability to talk to the “knowing and knowable” spirits of the yet-to-be-born, the living and those who dwell in the afterlife. This cultural practice helped, in unexplained ways, to experience uninterrupted pregnancies or miscarriage. However, it has now become especially difficult to talk about miscarriage amongst Black women. I, however, can guarantee you a Black woman is struggling with loss due to miscarriage this holiday season. I speak so factually because of my personal experience.

Before God blessed my husband and I with our blessing of joy, I suffered 3 miscarriages. So, I know first-hand the impact a miscarriage can have on the mental health of a Black woman. As a licensed marriage and family therapist, I also know that miscarriage mentally hits Black women much harder than other women. African-American women are two times more likely to have a miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death when compared to white women. Socioeconomic status does not influence these results. There is no clear reason why Black women experience miscarriages more often than white women, but research hints to the racial trauma we experience. 

Sadly, these higher levels of pregnancy loss add to the already higher rates of depression and anxiety Black women face. Additionally, there are not many programs offering support specifically geared to women who have experienced miscarriages. This lack of support creates feelings of loneliness and isolation, which for a Black woman can increase her potential for depression. Why? Because we are disconnected from our traditional cultural moorings resulting in our often feeling alone and isolated in our daily experiences of being Black. Lack of support for pregnancy loss causes feelings of isolation and intensifies loneliness.

As a mental health specialist, I believe the best way to support Black women experiencing miscarriages is to first invite them to talk with trusted family and friends and to seek counseling from African centered trained therapists. During this painful time, I believe we need to recognize and do the following:

 

#1 – Black women need to be held after experiencing a miscarriage.

We may say we don’t; we may even push you away. But we need to be held during this time of loss. Not just in the initial moments and days after losing a baby, we also needto be held weeks, months, and even years after our losses. Keep in mind that holding doesn’t always mean a physical hold. Sometimes Black women need to be held emotionally. Our emotions may not always be pretty. They may be loud, bold, or akin to a quiet storm. But our emotions are true to us however they show up! Make sure to hold and support the Black women in your lives who have experienced pregnancy loss…it matters.

#2 – Experiencing a miscarriage is not a “keep it together” situation.  

If you don’t remember anything else from this article, remember this: MISCARRIAGE IS NOT A “KEEP IT TOGETHER” SITUATION!!! The loss of a pregnancy, a child, is traumatic, regardless of the stage of pregnancy a woman was in. Black women are prone to experience this trauma more intensely because of all the hats we wear and how we are forced to move through society. On a deeper level, many of our ancestors lost babies during the middle passage, during slavery, and during the fight for civil rights. Losing babies hits our wombs inter-generationally and trauma is etched into our psyche. Be careful not to encourage a Black woman who has lost a child to hold it together. Be cautious of the common language used “It will be okay”;”Just keep praying”; or “In due time.” These phrases mean well, and may even be true, but they also endorse the idea that Black women should move on because we are praying and/or believing that things will be okay. They endorse the need to always be strong and hold it together. But, when we allow ourselves to NOT keep it together, true and authentic healing can happen. It is important to allow a Black woman to process the grief felt with pregnancy loss. This brings me to my final point.

#3 – Expressive healing is what a Black woman needs after a miscarriage.

We need different forms of expression. We don’t always need to talk. Sometimes we just need to be in the presence of like-minded people. We sometimes need to be in the presence of people who express things cathartically, creating peace and positive energy. This can be through music, dancing, church, poetry, amd many other healing forms of expression. Often it is these deeper forms of expression, not related to our verbal abilities that allow a Black woman to not forget the hurt of losing a baby, but rather cope with it in healthy ways.

 

I pray that my story will help others think of the many untold stories of pregnancy loss. And if you are reading this, and still waiting on your blessing, I say to you I see you Sista: your pain is valid, your emotions are justified, and you are not alone.

The Association of Black Psychologists, Bay Area Chapter (ABPsi-Bay Area) is committed to providing the Post Newspaper readership with monthly discussions about critical issues in Black mental health. The ABPsi-Bay Area is a healing resource. We can be contacted at (bayareaabpsi@gmail.com) and readers are welcome to join us at our monthly chapter meeting, every third Saturday at the West Oakland Youth Center from 10 a.m. to 12 p.m.

 

Narissa L. Harris, LMFT, Member, ABPsi- Bay Area

Narissa L. Harris, LMFT, Member, ABPsi- Bay Area

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Commentary

OPINION: The Philippines Isn’t Foreign When Your Family Still Lives There

Americans complain about inflation. Filipinos complain about surviving. That’s not a knock on America. It’s a reminder that for millions of Filipino Americans, the Philippines isn’t some faraway place we visit on vacation. It’s where our parents were born. Where our cousins still

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AI-generated photo by Open AI.

Americans complain about inflation.

Filipinos complain about surviving.

That’s not a knock on America. It’s a reminder that for millions of Filipino Americans, the Philippines isn’t some faraway place we visit on vacation. It’s where our parents were born. Where our cousins still live. Where grandparents are buried. Where every phone call home can begin with, “We’re okay,” or, just as easily, “We need help.”

The Bay Area is home to one of the nation’s largest Filipino communities. California alone has nearly two million Filipinos—roughly half of all Filipino Americans in the United States.

Every year, Filipino Americans send an estimated $17 billion from the United States to the Philippines. Those remittances account for roughly a tenth of the Philippine economy. One wire transfer may keep children in school, put food on the table, pay hospital bills, or help elderly parents make it another month.

That’s why Filipino Americans were paying attention to President Ferdinand Marcos Jr.’s State of the Nation Address this week.

They were listening for justice.

They were listening for Lyle Prijoles.

Prijoles, a 40-year-old Filipino American from Hayward, was killed on April 19 during a Philippine military operation in Negros Occidental. Also killed was Kai Sorem, a 26-year-old activist from Seattle.

The Armed Forces of the Philippines say those killed were connected to the Communist Party’s New People’s Army.

Their families say otherwise.

Human-rights advocates describe Prijoles and Sorem as labor organizers and peaceful activists working alongside sugar workers struggling under crushing poverty. Prijoles had traveled repeatedly to the Philippines since 2006, documenting conditions in Negros and advocating for farm workers whose lives rarely improve no matter who occupies the presidential palace in Manila.

Those conflicting stories are exactly why members of Congress, led by Rep. Pramila Jayapal (D-WA-7), have called for an independent investigation.

After all, two American citizens are dead.

If an ally’s military kills Americans under disputed circumstances, shouldn’t we want to know exactly what happened?

Yet the story barely made news in the United States.

Perhaps because it’s inconvenient.

It’s inconvenient for Manila – and Washington.

Strategic allies aren’t supposed to kill American citizens.

The Philippines isn’t just another country.

It’s family.

President Marcos had bigger issues on his mind this week.

China’s growing aggression in the West Philippine Sea dominated much of the speech. Marcos rightly rejected racist insults aimed at Filipinos and insisted his country would not surrender its sovereignty.

“We are not racists. We are not liars,” Marcos declared. “We are respectful, and we are dignified. We are Filipinos, and we do not yield.”

Strong words.

But patriotism isn’t measured only by how forcefully a government stands up to China.

It’s also measured by how a government treats its own people.

The Philippines inherited many of America’s democratic institutions. Even the “State of the Nation Address” echoes our “State of the Union.” Congress. Elections. Constitutional government. We exported the architecture of democracy.

What we couldn’t export was accountability.

That’s why activists like Lyle Prijoles believed ordinary workers deserved better.

And that’s why his death matters.

About the Author

Emil Guillermo is an award-winning journalist, political analyst and comic monologist. See him on his microtalk show on YouTube at @emilamok1.

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Commentary

Asm. McKinnor’s Bill Banning Drones Above Outdoor Entertainment Events Awaits Senate Decision

POST NEWS GROUP —

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Assemblymember Tina McKinnor (D-Inglewood), right, introduced Assembly Bill 2113 to address a public safety enforcement gap involving unauthorized personal drones flying over crowds at large outdoor events in California. A violation would be an infraction punishable by a fine of up to $500. McKinnor is shown with fellow California Legislative Black Caucus member Assemblymember Isaac Bryan (D-Ladera Heights). CBM photo by Antonio Ray Harvey.

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Assemblymember Tina McKinnor (D-Inglewood) is advancing legislation that would prohibit unauthorized drones from operating within 400 feet of large outdoor ticketed entertainment events. 

Assembly Bill 2113, titled “Aviation: Unmanned Aircraft Systems: Ticketed Entertainment Events,” passed the Senate Public Safety Committee on June 30 by a 6-0 vote and was referred to the Senate Appropriations Committee. 

The Assembly approved the bill May 18 on a bipartisan 72-0 vote, with support from 54 Democrats and 18 Republicans. AB 2113 must clear the Senate Appropriations Committee before the Legislature’s Aug. 31 deadline to remain active. 

“Large, ticketed entertainment events such as concerts, festivals, and sporting events bring thousands of people into dense confined spaces, including many venues in my (California State Assembly District 61),” McKinnor said. “Unauthorized drones and activities in these settings pose a real risk to public safety and can interfere with event operations and emergency response.” 

McKinnor said the legislation would establish a state-level restriction that local authorities could enforce while preserving the federal government’s authority over U.S. airspace. 

McKinnor also said, “While the Federal Government regulates airspace, local law enforcement is responsible for protecting public safety on the ground, yet current law does not provide a clear state-level prohibition addressing this issue.

Under the bill, the restriction would apply to outdoor professional music, sporting, or performing arts events held at venues with a capacity of at least 1,000 people.

Each violation would be an infraction punishable by a $500 fine. 

McKinnor, who chairs the Assembly Select Committee on the 2028 Olympic and Paralympic Games and the Los Angeles County Legislative Delegation, said the restrictions are particularly important as California prepares to host major international gatherings, including the 2028 Olympic and Paralympic Games. 

“AB 2113 protects the intellectual property rights of artists and addresses a growing public safety gap at public events due to the growing use of drones across California,” said McKinnor, a member of the California Legislative Black Caucus (CLBC). 

The Association for Uncrewed Vehicle Systems International (AUVSI) has raised concerns about the bill’s potential effects on legitimate commercial drone operations. 

Mason Sisk, the group’s director of government affairs, said AB 2113 would address the “disruptive use of drones,” including operations that infringe on artists’ intellectual property. However, the trade association has asked McKinnor’s office to add an exemption for commercial flights providing services such as cargo transportation and infrastructure inspections. 

“Our issue with the bill really has to do with the distinction between the ‘loitering and hovering’ and the disruptive use of drones. So, I would ask that the committee not support the bill until we have language figured out,” Sisk told the Senate Committee on Public Safety.

To address concerns raised during the legislative process, McKinnor accepted amendments that narrowed the bill’s scope and exempted certain authorized operations. The prohibition would not apply to venue-approved flights, venue employees conducting official business, regulated utility employees performing official duties, or emergency personnel responding to an incident. 

“My office and the sponsor have been engaging with stakeholders throughout this process, and I want to thank everyone for their patience and collaboration,” McKinnor said. “We remain committed to working in good faith as the bill moves forward to address concerns of stakeholders.” 

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Black History

George Cook: The Inventor Who Made Fishing Smarter

George Cook was a Black American inventor from Louisville, Kentucky. He was born in 1863, during a time when Black Americans faced unfair laws, limited opportunities, and many barriers to education, jobs, and recognition. Even with these challenges, he became known for his intell

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A copy of the patent for George Cook’s Automatic Fishing Device. Public domain.

George Cook was a Black American inventor from Louisville, Kentucky. He was born in 1863, during a time when Black Americans faced unfair laws, limited opportunities, and many barriers to education, jobs, and recognition. Even with these challenges, he became known for his intelligence, honesty, and ability to think in practical ways. Some records say he worked as a cook for Buffalo Bill Cody and later as a chef on a private dining car for the Louisville and Nashville Railroad. He was even known by the nickname “Honest Mister Cook.”

As with many Black American inventors and scientists of that era, there is little biographical information about Mr. Cook.

Cook’s most famous invention was the Automatic Fishing Device. He received U.S. Patent No. 625,829 for it on May 30, 1899. His patent shows that he was not just someone with an idea, but someone who made it happen.

So, what did the Automatic Fishing Device do? Imagine fishing with a line in the water. Usually, you have to watch carefully and pull the line at just the right moment when a fish bites. Cook wanted to make that process easier. His device was designed to react when a fish pulled on the line. The tension from the fish would trigger a lever. That lever would release a spring-loaded part of the device, causing it to move quickly and help pull in the line. The device also had an alarm gong that would ring to let the fisher know something was happening.

This invention was important because it used simple mechanical ideas in a clever way. Springs, levers, rails, and alarms were not new by themselves, but Cook combined them to solve a real problem. His device showed how inventors often take familiar parts and arrange them in a new way to make life easier. 

Cook looked at fishing and asked, “How can this be improved?” Then, he created a device that could respond automatically when a fish tugged on the line. His invention let fishermen relax instead of watching the line for hours, trusting the alarm to alert them.

Cook may not be as famous as some inventors, but his Automatic Fishing Device shows that creativity and innovation can be applied anywhere. His legacy lives on as part of the larger story of Black innovation in America.

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