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Book Review: “Ladysitting: My Year with Nana at the End of Her Century”

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You were their hope for the future.

For your elders, your birth represented things they wished would happen but that they’d never know. It was a joy for them to see you come into the world but for you, as in the new book “Ladysitting” by Lorene Cary, it’s harder to see them go.

When it comes to children, “spoiling” is a word that Black adults particularly hate to hear, but that’s what Lorene Cary says she got from her Nana.

Some of Cary’s earliest memories are of Nana’s sun-splashed New Jersey apartment, make-believe play, and being cherished. Nana didn’t indulge her completely – Cary had rules to follow – but Nana showered love and paid attention, two things Cary needed most.

Back then, Lorene H. Jackson had been a formidable force, a no-nonsense, feisty and independent, powerful businesswoman who still went to her Philadelphia office well into her 90s. A decade later, the summer she turned 100, a bladder infection set her low and she became frail, sometimes rattled. Because there were complications and family issues, Cary moved Nana into her home, a rectory near the church where Cary’s husband was a minister.

On both sides, it would take some getting-used-to.

The Cary family was a busy one: there were older children in the household, Cary had founded a growing non-profit to nurture, and there was a congregation to attend to. For her part, Nana could be irascible; she obviously hated being dependent, fretted about her possessions, and she couldn’t be alone for long.

Tensions rose. And then Nana began to seriously decline.

Falls and confusion became all too common. Nana’s hearing, which hadn’t been good for some time, worsened. And yet, she outlived her allotted hospice time, and her memory remained relatively sharp. She had enough spring in her life to make demands and to keep connections to family and friends.

Still, there was no denying it: Cary’s grandmother was dying…

Open the cover of “Ladysitting,” and you’re immediately yanked into a story with an ending you already know. Get past that initial, irresistible pull, though, and it may feel like a challenge to continue: author Lorene Cary seems to lose focus.

Was that done accidentally, or by design?

Doesn’t matter, because it works to show readers what it’s like to care for someone who’s elderly or terminally ill, while trying to do self-care and maintain some amount of control over the uncontrollable. There’s linear thought here, but only enough to keep readers awake. Frustration comes roaring through, but not so that compassion slips. Confusion is everywhere in this tale, but it doesn’t forsake compassion. Cary adds careful amounts of family history for clarity, even daring to include occasional humorous anecdotes – not inappropriately, but in enhancement of what is one of the more deftly-written, truthful accounts in this genre.

The key here is patience because this is a tough story to know.  That’s especially true for millennials and older GenXers: “Ladysitting” is good, but it could offer a small glimpse into your future.

“Ladysitting: My Year with Nana at the End of Her Century” by Lorene Cary, c.2019, W.W. Norton, $25.95 / $34.95 Canada, 256 pages.

Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm Sez

Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm Sez

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Arts and Culture

Oakland Jazz Great Offers Master Class as City Declares “John Handy Day”

World-renowned jazz master saxophonist John Handy, a McClymond’s High School graduate, was presented with a Mayor of Oakland Proclamation declaring Feb. 12, as John Handy Day in the city. Handy is most notably known as the featured saxophonist for Charles Mingus on “Goodbye Pork Pie Hat” from the album “Mingus Ah Um” (1959) and on “Hard Work” from his own album “Hard Work” (1976).

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(L-R) Del Handy, John Handy, Roger Glenn, and Joe Warner celebrate John Handy Day at Geoffrey’s Inner Circle, Oakland. Photo by Lady Bianca.
(L-R) Del Handy, John Handy, Roger Glenn, and Joe Warner celebrate John Handy Day at Geoffrey’s Inner Circle, Oakland. Photo by Lady Bianca.

By Conway Jones

World-renowned jazz master saxophonist John Handy, a McClymond’s High School graduate, was presented with a Mayor of Oakland Proclamation declaring Feb. 12, as John Handy Day in the city.

Handy is most notably known as the featured saxophonist for Charles Mingus on “Goodbye Pork Pie Hat” from the album “Mingus Ah Um” (1959) and on “Hard Work” from his own album “Hard Work” (1976).

“John Handy is a jazz icon and an inspiration to musicians everywhere,” said Ayo Brame, a 16-year-old Oakland tenor saxophone player who is enrolled at the Oakland School for the Arts.

In celebration of this day, the reception in downtown Oakland at Geoffrey’s Inner Circle was a gathering of artists, young and old, coming together in his honor and celebrating his 91st birthday.

Handy presented a Saxophone Colossus free masterclass for musicians. This class afforded a rare opportunity to learn about the saxophone from an aficionado. The class was free and open to all – saxophonists, vocalists, aficionados, students, and casual listeners.

“As a longtime friend for over 60 years, and fellow musician who has had numerous opportunities to share the stage with John, it has always been a pleasure performing with him and hearing his creative interpretations of the music and his gift of ease inspiring the next generation of jazz musicians,” said Roger Glenn, a multi-instrumentalist.

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Arts and Culture

Musical Chronicling Life of Betty Reid Soskin Set for Bay Area Debut

Betty Reid Soskin’s storied 102 years includes time spent as a WWII defense worker, activist, business owner, songwriter, National Park Service park ranger and so much more. Now the Richmond icon is the subject of a musical based on her incredible life.

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Betty Reid Soskin. Photo courtesy of Rosie the Riveter/WWII Home Front National Historical Park in Richmond.
Betty Reid Soskin. Photo courtesy of Rosie the Riveter/WWII Home Front National Historical Park in Richmond.

The Richmond Standard

Betty Reid Soskin’s storied 102 years includes time spent as a WWII defense worker, activist, business owner, songwriter, National Park Service park ranger and so much more. Now the Richmond icon is the subject of a musical based on her incredible life.

Sign My Name to Freedom,” a San Francisco Bay Area Theatre Company (SFBATCO) production which will focus on the life, music and writing of Ms. Soskin, will premiere at San Francisco’s Z Space Friday, March 29 and continue through Saturday, April 13. Tickets range from $15–$65 and can be purchased online at https://www.sfbatco.org/smntf

The musical is directed by Elizabeth Carter, while playwright Michael Gene Sullivan integrates Ms. Soskin’s own music throughout dialogue between what SFBATCO calls “The Four Bettys” as they progress through a century of experiences of this awe-inspiring American woman.

The cast of “Sign My Name to Freedom” features Tierra Allen as Little Betty, Aidaa Peerzada as Married Betty, Lucca Troutman as Revolutionary Betty and Cathleen Riddley as Present Betty Reid Soskin, according to Artistic Director Rodney Earl Jackson Jr. and Managing Director Adam Maggio. Other casting will be announced in the future.

Jackson said that having Soskin’s blessing to steward her life’s story is an honor and career highlight for him and that her journey stands as “a beacon for Black Americans, women and people of color all across the world [and] is a testament to the strength of the human spirit.”

San Francisco’s Z Space is located at 450 Florida St. in San Francisco. Check out the trailer here at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-ap9N2XBB0

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Arts and Culture

Gov. Newsom and First Partner Jennifer Siebel Newsom Host 2024 Hall of Fame Ceremony

Former Assembly Speaker and San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown and three other African Americans were among 10 luminaries inducted into the 2024 Class of the California Hall of Fame on Feb. 8. The 17th Annual California Hall of Fame ceremony was held at the California Museum.

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Willie Brown, Former California Assembly Speaker and San Francisco Mayor, was proud to be among the Hall of Fame inductees. CBM photo by Antonio Ray Harvey.
Willie Brown, Former California Assembly Speaker and San Francisco Mayor, was proud to be among the Hall of Fame inductees. CBM photo by Antonio Ray Harvey.

By California Black Media

Former Assembly Speaker and San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown and three other African Americans were among 10 luminaries inducted into the 2024 Class of the California Hall of Fame on Feb. 8.

The 17th Annual California Hall of Fame ceremony was held at the California Museum.

“The California Hall of Fame is one of our families’ favorite traditions as it is a time to come together to celebrate remarkable Californians as well as their loved ones because we know that it is about partnerships,” Siebel Newsom said. “The governor likes to say that California is a dream factory because it doesn’t matter what zip code or background you come from, the California dream is alive and well to everyone who calls this state home.”

The other Black honorees were filmmaker Ava DuVernay; Federal Judge and civil rights leader, the Hon. Thelton Henderson; and basketball Hall of Fame player and broadcaster Cheryl Miller.

“It’s what I’ve been waiting for and to be among a great group of individuals that also deserve the honor,” Brown told California Black Media on the event’s red carpet before the ceremony began. “No, I never thought someone from Texas would be recognized this way. But here I am, and it all happened in the great state of California. It’s a fantastic feeling.”

Other 2024 inductees are: master chef and “mother of fusion cuisine” Helene An; computer scientist and “father of the internet” Vincent A. Cerf; all-female pop punk band The Go-Gos; Chicano Rock band Los Lobos; former U.S. Secretary of Defense and Congressman Leon E. Panetta; and artistic director and choreographer Brenda Way.

This year’s honorees join a history-making club with over 150 inspirational Californians previously inducted for their groundbreaking achievements and personifying the state’s innovative spirit.

“It’s just a humbling experience. I want to thank the Governor and First Partner. Who would have thought 100 years ago (that I would be inducted?) It’s incredible,” Miller said after her induction. “I want to thank the governor and First Partner for an incredible event.”

During his acceptance speech, Henderson said he was deeply honored.

“You know, it really would have been a really big deal to be inducted into the Hall of Fame in the area where I grew up, for example, South Central Hall of Fame, or the Watts Hall of Fame, or the Straight Out of Compton Hall of Fame,” he said. “But being inducted into the California Hall of Fame, Hall of Fame of the greatest state in the country in this great nation is something else.”

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