Commentary

COMMENTARY: How powerful patriarchs pave the way for prospective fathers

ROLLINGOUT — You never really know how to be a father until it is your turn to lead, teach and develop your own offspring. You use the examples and experiences you’ve either observed or acquired to become the most powerful patriarch you can be.

Published

5 years ago

June 18, 2019

N. Ali Early

By N. Ali Early

When I was in high school, I often wondered how my life would play out. The thoughts were plentiful and the questions were rampant… Who will I marry? Where will I live? What will I do for a living? How many kids will I have? What gender will they be? What kind of father will I be?

As of Monday, June 10, 2019, and with the birth of my third son, Kalel Ali Early, all of those questions and more, have been answered.

Fourteen years ago I met the love of my life. Five years into a relationship that began in this publishing industry — when urban magazines were as plentiful as wheat at a local bakery — we exchanged vows and haven’t looked back since. With the birth of our first child — Khalon — we decided on settling in Atlanta and have since welcomed Keon and Kalel.

I never knew what fatherhood would truly feel like. I did, however, know what it looked like. I watched and idolized my own father, my paternal and maternal grandfathers, uncles, coaches, big homies and others who sought to pass on their wisdom.

I distinctly remember a conversation I had with my college basketball coach, about ingrown hairs of all things. It may sound simplistic, but the moment was refreshing and necessary for a 20-year-old trying with all his might to maintain a clear complexion. He talked to my friend and I like he’d been there before and during that moment, we all forgot about basketball. As I allowed his wisdom to pour into my eager ears, I accepted advice that rings true today and learned a valuable lesson rooted in patience.

You never really know how to be a father until it is your turn to lead, teach and develop your own offspring. You use the examples and experiences you’ve either observed or acquired to become the most powerful patriarch you can be. It’s an awesome responsibility that I’ve taken on and accepted fully. I respect it. I own it and I love it.

With a newborn, four-year-old and 10-year-old in tow, my journey is in full swing. Watching my children grow and change, then being able to shift gears as they do, is something I am still figuring out. That I am more than happy to share my knowledge, wisdom and experience with them, is an overwhelming understatement.

Happy Father’s Day to all the real ones out there. Be blessed and always “Be a father to your child.”

This article originally appeared in Rollingout.com.

N. Ali Early

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Oakland Post: Week of April 24 – 30, 2024

The printed Weekly Edition of the Oakland Post: Week of April 24 – 30, 2024

Published

7 days ago

April 26, 2024

Oakland Post

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Oakland Post: Week of April 17 – 23, 2024

The printed Weekly Edition of the Oakland Post: Week of April 17 – 23, 2024

Published

2 weeks ago

April 19, 2024

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Commentary

Opinion: Surviving the Earthquake, an Eclipse and “Emil Amok.”

Last Friday, a 4.8 magnitude earthquake shook New York City, reported as the “biggest earthquake with an epicenter in the NYC area since 1884” when a 5.2 quake hit. A bit bigger. The last quake similar to Friday’s was a 4.9 in 1783.Alexander Hamilton felt it — 241 years ago. That’s why New Yorkers were freaking out on Friday. They were in the room where it happens.

Published

2 weeks ago

April 17, 2024

Oakland Post

In New York City, the eclipse was about 90 percent visible. Good enough for me. Though a full solar eclipse is a celestial rarity, blockages of any sort aren’t generally celebrated. My one-man play is about growing up with the eclipsed history of American Filipinos and how I struggle to unblock all that.

By Emil Guillermo

I’m a Northern Californian in New York City for the next few weeks, doing my one-man show, “Emil Amok, Lost NPR Host, Wiley Filipino, Vegan Transdad.”

I must like performing in the wake of Mother Nature.

Alexander Hamilton felt it — 241 years ago.

That’s why New Yorkers were freaking out on Friday. They were in the room where it happens.

And it just doesn’t happen that often.

Beyonce singing country music happens more frequently.

When I felt New York shake last week, it reminded me of a time in a San Francisco TV newsroom when editors fretted about a lack of news an hour before showtime.

Then the office carpeting moved for a good ten seconds, and the news gods gave us our lead story.

On Friday when it happened in NYC, I noticed the lines in the carpeting in my room wiggling. But I thought it was from a raucous hotel worker vacuuming nearby.

I didn’t even think earthquake. In New York?

I just went about my business as if nothing had happened. After living near fault lines all my life, I was taking things for granted.

Considering the age of structures in New York, I should have been even more concerned about falling objects inside (shelves, stuff on walls) and outside buildings (signs, scaffolding), fire hazards from possible gas leaks, and then I should have looked for others on my floor and in the hotel lobby to confirm or aid or tell stories.

Of course, as a Californian who has lived through and covered quakes in the 4 to 6 magnitude range, I tried to calm down any traumatized New Yorker I encountered by taking full responsibility for bringing in the quake from the Bay Area.

I reassured them things would be all right, and then let them know that 4.8s are nothing.

And then I invited them to my consoling post-Earthquake performance of “Emil Amok, Lost NPR Host…”

It was the night of the eclipse.

ECLIPSING THE ECLIPSE

For example, did you know the first Filipinos actually arrived to what is now California in 1587? That’s 33 years before the Pilgrims arrived in America on the other coast, but few know the Filipino history which has been totally eclipsed.

I was in Battery Park sitting on a bench and there was a sense of community as people all came to look up. A young woman sitting next to me had a filter for a cell phone camera. We began talking and she let me use it. That filter enabled me to take a picture of the main event with my iPhone.

For helping me see, I invited her and her boyfriend to come see my show.

Coincidentally, she was from Plymouth, Massachusetts, near the rock that says the year the Pilgrims landed in 1620.

In my show she learned the truth. The Pilgrims were second.

History unblocked. But it took a solar eclipse.

Next one in 2044? We have a lot more unblocking to do.

If you’re in New York come see my show, Sat. April 13th, 5:20 pm Eastern; Fri. April 19, 8:10 pm Eastern; and Sun. April 21st 5:20 pm Eastern.

You can also livestream the show. Get tickets at www.amok.com/tickets

About the Author

Emil Guillermo is a journalist and commentator. He does a mini-talk show on YouTube.com/@emilamok1. He wishes all his readers a Happy Easter!