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You Had Me at Hello: ‘It is important to yield, listen and understand your spouse’

THE BIRMINGHAM TIMES — “You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them.

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By Anita Debro

“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone who would, please send nominations to Erica Wright at ewright@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.

A’KHI AND RAVEN KING

Live: Vestavia Hills

Married: April 28, 2018

Met: A’Khi and Raven met in 2006 at New Birth Family Church when they were both in the teen ministry. Raven said she was friends with A’Khi but nothing more. “We were just a group of teens who went bowling and skating together,” Raven recalled. “I had no interest in him then.” A’Khi felt differently, though. “I liked her.”  By the summer of 2012 the two had become best friends. “I had seen her with all of her boyfriends,” A’Khi said. Shortly after Raven broke up with a boyfriend the two began talking more and the idea of being in a relationship surfaced.  “I really prayed about it and him,” Raven said. “I started to see his love for God and I could see his heart.” Raven said she and A’Khi were very different — she was an extrovert and he was a quiet homebody.  A’Khi did not think that those differences should keep them from being together.  After more prayer, Raven decided to put her trust and faith in A’Khi.  Just as their relationship was getting started, A’Khi left for Tuskegee University.

First date: Because A’Khi was away at Tuskegee and Raven remained in Birmingham, it would be nearly two years after they began dating before the couple would actually go on a real date. “We mainly saw each other on Skype,” Raven said. In 2014 they finally went to Chili’s Restaurant in Trussville. “I had saved up just enough money to take her out,” A’khi recalled.

The proposal: A’Khi felt that the time was right in 2016 to ask for Raven’s hand in marriage.  He bought a ring and decided to propose after a movie date. “I had the ring in my pocket and as soon as the credits started rolling my heart was beating loudly,” he said. Raven said she went to the restroom after the movie was over and when she returned she could not find A’Khi and the rest of the family members who had come to the movie. Raven said she became frustrated when she could not find A’Khi and when she finally found him she was ready to fuss. A’Khi said he pretended to start an argument but then instead proposed. “My mouth just dropped open,” Raven said. She said “yes.” But a few months into their engagement the couple ended the relationship. “It was a bad break up,” Raven said. “We both thought we were done with each other.”

“I actually lost the engagement ring that I gave to her,” A’Khi said. “It was that bad.”

Take Two: A’Khi and Raven spent six months apart before reconciling. One of the things that sparked the reconciliation was a chance meeting between A’Khi and her father at church, Raven said. “They met and clicked immediately,” Raven said. “My father encouraged me to unblock him and to talk about what I was feeling.” Raven said that meeting and her father’s approval of A’Khi ultimately led them back together. On Christmas 2017 A’Khi, with a new engagement ring, proposed to Raven for the second time.

The wedding: The couple wed at the Trussville Civic Center. Raven remembers being nervous and shaking before her vows, but her nerves calmed after she walked down the aisle. “That day was amazing,” she said. “I was just very grateful.” A’Khi said he was not nervous, but instead excited about beginning their journey as a married couple.

Words of Wisdom: The couple said they have learned a great deal in nearly one year of marriage. “I have learned how to yield,” he said. “It is important to yield and to listen and try to understand (your spouse),” A’Khi said.

Raven said it is important for couples to be committed to continuing to learn about their spouse and to learn how to be a couple. “I don’t know everything and he doesn’t know everything, so we have to keep learning,” she said. “It is important for a couple to continue to learn each other and learn how to be a healthy and happy couple.”

Happily ever after: Raven and A’Khi enjoy going to the movies. Raven likes to travel, while A’Khi likes to spend time at home, hang out with friends and play pool with his team.  Raven, a native of Selma, is an aspiring dancer and actress. She teaches dance classes and also works on the staff at Danberry Assisted Living.  A’Khi, a Birmingham native, works for the Birmingham Water Works.

This article originally appeared in The Birmingham Times

Bay Area

Emiliano Zapata Street Academy Celebrates 40 Years Serving Oakland Families

The Oakland Emiliano Zapata Street Academy, a public alternative high school, celebrated its 50th anniversary this year with a community party and festival last Saturday with live music, good food, vendors’ booths, and activities for adults and children.

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Live music was part of the 50th anniversary celebration of the Emiliano Zapata Street Academy, a public alternative high school, on April 27, at St. Augustine’s Episcopal Church on Telegraph Avenue and 29th Street. Photo by Ken Epstein.
Live music was part of the 50th anniversary celebration of the Emiliano Zapata Street Academy, a public alternative high school, on April 27, at St. Augustine’s Episcopal Church on Telegraph Avenue and 29th Street. Photo by Ken Epstein.

By Ken Epstein

The Oakland Emiliano Zapata Street Academy, a public alternative high school, celebrated its 50th anniversary this year with a community party and festival last Saturday with live music, good food, vendors’ booths, and activities for adults and children.

Attending the Saturday, April 27 celebration were current and past students, families, faculty, and supporters of the school. The school is located at 417 29th St., and the celebration was held nearby at St. Augustine’s Episcopal Church on Telegraph Avenue in Oakland.

For more information, go to www.streetacademy.online or call 510) 874-3630 or (510) 879-2313.

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Alameda County

A Safe Place, Bay Area Domestic Violence Community Organization, Opens New Service Center in Oakland

Oakland-Bay Area non-profit, A Safe Place, announces the grand opening of its newly purchased building in Oakland that will be a service center for families that have suffered from domestic violence. The new, two-story building has over six new service rooms for counseling, mental health support groups, legal services, children’s treatment, safe space for community engagement, and partnership activities.

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Façade of the new community center for A Safe Place opening on May 10 in Oakland. Courtesy photo.
Façade of the new community center for A Safe Place opening on May 10 in Oakland. Courtesy photo.

By Courtney Slocum Riley

Special to The Post

Oakland-Bay Area non-profit, A Safe Place, announces the grand opening of its newly purchased building in Oakland that will be a service center for families that have suffered from domestic violence.

The new, two-story building has over six new service rooms for counseling, mental health support groups, legal services, children’s treatment, safe space for community engagement, and partnership activities.

Domestic violence occurrences and offenses account for a considerable amount of all violent crimes in Alameda County. A Safe Place is attempting to provide a safe place for families to heal. A Safe Place is the only comprehensive domestic violence assistance program including a safehouse, in Oakland.

The grand opening celebration will also serve as a fundraiser to build out healing, therapeutic spaces for children and adult victims and survivors and survivors of domestic violence (male and female).

The new service center will expand the work of the organization, founded in 1976 when a group of women working in San Francisco came together to address the urgent need for a shelter in the East Bay. A year later, they founded A Safe Place (ASP) in Oakland. Run solely by volunteers, they set up a crisis line to offer crisis counseling and information to battered women and their children.

The organization serves over 500 adults and children annually through a host of services including crisis counseling via 24-hour crisis line, emergency motel and safehouse sheltering, mental health services (counseling and support groups).

Under the leadership of Executive Director, Carolyn Russell, the organization has grown from a single program into the comprehensive domestic violence and assistance program. ASP strives to meet the growing and diverse needs of our growing community.

The organization hopes to complete all the upgrades and therapeutic room improvements by August 2024. The public is invited to donate to the effort by using the website at www.asafeplace.org/donate. The organization also accepts in-kind gifts as well as items from the organization’s Amazon Wishlist.

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Bay Area

Obituary: Former California Education Superintendent Delaine Eastin Passes at 76

Delaine Eastin, who served as a former state Assemblymember representing parts of Santa Clara and Alameda County — and the first woman elected as State Superintendent of Public Instruction — died at age 76 on April 23. Eastin passed away from complications caused by a stroke.

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Former California Education Superintendent Delaine Eastin.
Former California Education Superintendent Delaine Eastin.

By California Black Media

Delaine Eastin, who served as a former state Assemblymember representing parts of Santa Clara and Alameda County — and the first woman elected as State Superintendent of Public Instruction — died at age 76 on April 23.

Eastin passed away from complications caused by a stroke.

Known for her power of persuasion, Eastin used her influence to be a champion for bipartisan issues that helped raise academic standards, lower class sizes, and emphasize the importance of conserving nature and the environment in schools.

Former Assembly Speaker Willie Brown and fellow legislative colleagues said that Eastin was in demand on the speech circuit while serving as a legislator.

“Few could engender the kind of emotion and passion she delivered in every speech,” Brown said.

State superintendent Tony Thurmond called Eastin a trailblazer who inspired fellow public servants.

“California lost an icon in our school system today. Delaine Eastin’s legacy as a trailblazer in public education will forever inspire us. Her unwavering dedication to California students — from championing Universal Preschool and the “A Garden in Every School” program to honoring our educators by establishing the California Teachers of the Year Awards — has left an indelible mark on our state’s educational landscape,” said Thurmond.

Thurmond honored Eastin’s legacy at the California Teacher of the Year Program, an honor that she established during her time as superintendent.

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